Is it Love? Evaluate for Yourself…
When true love is present, you stop wondering, worrying and trying and instead effortlessly share, listen, speak, trust, forgive, enjoy and empathize.
February 28, 2020
For years, I misunderstood love. I thought it was a noun, but I have learned it is an action verb. When true love is present, you stop wondering, worrying and trying and instead effortlessly share, listen, speak, trust, forgive, enjoy and empathize.
Love needs active participation, effort and devotion.
10 signs it might be love:
- If without thinking, you consistently show up as your best self, regardless if your partner is being their best self.
- If you share a healthy balance of intimacy, compatibility and practicality.
- If you humbly listen and ask curious questions when your partner is sharing a story.
- If you can bravely share all your audacious dreams, goals and fantasies without fear, judgement, or ridicule.
- If you are curious about why your partner is how they are and you respect who they are and their beliefs.
- If on your worst day, you still feel validated, safe and loved.
- If most days, you feel calm, content and supported.
- If you feel more present and capable of dealing with life because your partner has your back.
- If your partner builds you up, appreciates you and shows you they care.
- If you feel more expansive and willing to learn and grow as individuals and and as a couple.
10 signs it definitely is not love:
- If the way you show up consistently depends on the other person’s mood or the way they texted or spoke to you in the last 24 hours.
- If there is crazy chemistry but nothing to talk about.
- If you pretend to listen but internally you are judging and can’t wait for them to shut up.
- If you have to play it safe for fear of judgment, ridicule or abandonment.
- If your partner disagrees with your decision, opinion and/or taste, you believe it means that they are against you.
- If you don’t think they can teach you anything or inspire you.
- If you feel desperate and out of control.
- If you believe they are your everything and you can’t live without them.
- If you often feel invalidated, ashamed, and invisible.
- If you think future changes might ruin the relationship.
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